Difference.

I'm not an avid blog reader. I just blog. I needed a place to act as a journal. I know I'm a bit different then the other blog writers, because earlier today, my curiosity took me to go looking through other blogs. I just want to write things that other people can relate to. That is my new goal: Writing to relate. Hopefully it will work out, and I'll try to put more pictures up since my blog seems very, well, bland!

Feelings.

The feelings we have are by far, to hard comprehend. We can never understand them. Especially me. It's the people in our lives that make our emotions change. I for example, have a life filled with both good and bad people. I also have people that I just can't seem to forget no matter how hard I try, because they're just so special to me. Those people are the dangerous ones. I have about 3 of those people in my life at the moment and I try so hard to get them out of my head, and I can't. They just have amazing qualities that make them so unforgettable. These people make me happy, and sad, and confused. They make me question if they think I'm juts as special as them. Most likely I'm not, because I'm just not that person people want, or want to be with or around. If people knew me by my writings, they'd probably have a different take on me, but they don't know me by my writing. They just know me by me. I just wish that one person, whoever it is, hopefully one of my 3 unforgettable people, will come and feel the same way about me. Maybe I won't be such an emotional wreck anymore!

Friday poems!

Just a little thing I went through-

The pain in my heart could not be explained with a word,
The hurt I felt couldn't be much more,
Though me body was still going,
My heart was intensely sore.

I couldn't come to understand why he had did that,
My mind just could not comprehend,
I didn't know if I could see him again,
My heart needed time to mend.

Of course I could tell it wasn't real,
I knew other girls were in his head,
Still, I hoped it was the truth,
Because I love you was the only thing I wanted to be said.

But it was all just fun and games,
My heart didn't exactly feel the fun,
Though it hurt for a little,
It just made me stronger when it was all said and done.

The goodness of all of us!

So today was a great day. I went on a retreat. I realized that God is in everyone, no matter what religion, race, or skin color. We just have to have a good enough heart to see it. All of us have potential to do great things and to change the world. We just have to start with ourselves and realizing the good in others. Anyway, this was a short post, but it was worth it. I just wanted to write a little bit of what my next or one of my later posts will be about! Have a good friday!

On a lighter note :)

I love poems. I love reading and writing them. So heres one of the many I have written and will post. I wanted it to be a happy one too and since I'm missing summer because of all the work I've been loaded with lately, I decided to write one about the beach.

Walking along the damp seashore,
Lying in the soft cold sand,
Looking for mysterious seashells,
Inspecting them with our hands.

Swimming in the sparkling sea,
The sun kissing our salty hair,
Examining the seagulls fly by,
High above in the summer air.

Being covered by a blanket of warmth,
Watching the weeds in the dunes swing,
Getting tumbled by the waves,
But forgetting the way it stings.

Wishing this day will never end,
Seeing the sun setting in the West,
Happy I spent this day here,
Now I go home to dream and rest.

Knowledge.

Gained from my knowledge of every day life, I feel like all of us know nothing. I'm not talking about facts and history and all the useless yet important things we learn from our textbooks. Those facts are nice from time to time, but most people dread learning it. I mean, it's not like all of us are going to end up participating on "Jeopardy," though I have tried. Anyway, back to my point, none of us know anything. We know nothing about life. We know nothing about happiness or sadness, or any emotions or feelings. Do we ever know what's going to happen next? No. We don't know. We don't even know what's in our futures. Some people try, very hard, to predict their futures. What they say isn't true! Sorry to burst anyone's little bubble, but somebody has to do it at sometime! There are no mind readers or physics. There is nothing. If someone make thousands of predictions, odds are, at least a few will come close to being true. Some people also plan out their whole entire lives so that everything goes well. Want to know my opinion on this? JUST LIVE! Knowing things and worrying about those things is only going to ruin the majority of your life. Living life and not knowing things, especially what's going to happen next, just makes your life happier and more exciting. Don't you want a thrill from time to time, instead of the plain old "bores?" So live life to the fullest! (Boy, didn't I just sound like everyone else just there?) But honestly, being a genius and knowing everything is B-O-R-I-N-G! It's good for somethings but you were given a life so you can live it to its fullest extent. The essence of life isn't learning. It's experiencing things, making mistakes, and learning from them. When you die just knowing everything, you'll realize your life wasn't as good as it could of been. When you live your life just living you'll realize that you lived and learned and had a wonderful life, no matter how many terrible things happened in it. I believe that in the end, you learn more living to the fullest, then just trying to learn everything in life.
So don't just know.
Try to live!

Loosing

It always seems as if everyone in the world has that special someone, no matter what age. Everyone loves and looses at times but some people just always loose. That’s me. The loser, and that’s a legitimate statement. I’m not the “losers” in school or anything in that sort, but I seem to be the one who always loses. I mean I am blessed, I never doubt that, but I’m always sad. I have no one. I let chances pass me by, when I should just take them. I worry too much about the things that could happen if I take chances. I can only stand so much more before I break. Correction: before my heart breaks, before it shatters in to a million tiny pieces. Everyone I know has practically had at least 3 boyfriends and many kisses. I have never felt so behind everyone. I always feel like crying, but I’ve been so good at hiding my emotions and keeping them to myself. So, I hide my sadness. I make sure I don’t let anyone see it. I just wish and pray that someone comes along and fixes my heart.

Pilot (right?)

I don't think before I write. Do I? I actually have no idea. All I know is I write what my heart feels and thinks. I said HEART did you realize that? Not my mind. I guess it's because I think from my heart not my mind. My mind is useless, just filled with knowledge, really just facts, learned in school. My heart on the other hand thinks in unique ways. I decided to write this blog because I needed somewhere to write what my heart thinks. I thought this would be the perfect place. Whether nobody reads this blog, or the whole entire world reads it, I don't care. I just want a way to express my feelings, since I could never express them to a person I'm conversing with. I write quite a lot. I waste a lot of time writing as well. Most of the time I push aside school work to write. Writing is a passion, and a work of art. So, from now on, this will be my journal, where I jot down my thoughts. Before I click publish post, I'd like to briefly explain my title. As I said I don't think before I write, therefore I rarely make accurate titles. I decided to name it "Pilot" so that I could give you a general idea of what my first post would be about and that is what I would most likely be writing about in the course of this blog.