Doing everything you can or not doing anything at all.

I'm so bad at being consistent. Not purposely, I desire so badly to be consistent but my schedule makes it such a challenge to be. I haven't written in quite sometime and that makes me feel useless and disconsolate. I truly think there is something wrong with me. Something wrong with my head. I've been attempting to diagnose myself with some strange website but I've let my imagination run wild and now I think I have over 30 different diseases. (That's what I do when I'm bored. When I should be writing. And no, I'm not really that strange, I just have a habit of convincing myself things. That's where the problem starts.) I've come to a point where I have convinced myself that I don't do anything productive with my life. Why do I think that? Its so idiotic that I would even think that because for my age, I do many activities that could keep me busy for a lifetime. The one thing that irritates me the most and causes me to think that is that I'm not successful at what I do. No one reads this blog, at least not that I know of, and everything else I do still hasn't taken off. I think I bore people with this, but at times I believe it could be somewhat helpful. Long story short, I feel as if all my effort is useless, but I keep telling myself patience and consistency (well sort-of) are what will lead em to success. At least self-believed success. But for now, I hope to continue to write, write, write, and write some more, until I'm confident my writing will impact someone. Anyone.